Reality has been hitting us really hard the past week. Apart from sleepy and fuzzy head all day long, which getting much better day after day, the most difficult part is to cope with the huge emptiness and depression since my children left me seven days ago.
It was quite a dramatic week for us in fact. First, Ruggero was struggling with his unknown fever for the first three days as soon we came home from the airport which made me worry. But he is much better now. The fever is long gone and he has regained his strength. Meanwhile, my son was going crazy with his room cleaning and packaging for moving. My daughter stayed up till 4am that morning to keep him company while Ruggero and I were fighting with the jet-lag. The next day, as we were driving back and forth to the airport to drop my son first and my daughter after (they had different flight schedules) on our very old van, the car broke down on the freeway.
Luckily, Vicki was the only left (my son, Marc already abroad by that time). And since we have AAA membership service, it took me only a minute to figure out how to deal with the problem while Ruggero and my daughter were panic with the unexpected disaster at first.
After several phone calls, a Vietnamese transporting service company agreed to come immediately to pick up Vicki and bring her to the airport just in time with a very cheap price. Meanwhile, the AAA already came to our rescue just ten minutes after Ruggero contacted them (It is so worth it to pay for this service every year with only $50.00/year).
So I thought it was just a hectic moment and it would pass in the end with good results. But siting on the big truck over 100 miles and then stuck in the traffic-jam for an extra three hours (total of five hours journey) on the way home, I almost had a nervous breakdown with the noises and jumping up and down motions. I was almost dead by the time we reach home that evening. We decided to take one extra day of resting the next day to recuperate. It really helped.
After that incident, the next following three days, Ruggero again had to fight with the water overflowed in the kitchen from the main sewer of the restaurant building.
Lots of phone calls, lots of meetings and disputes and schedules, plus the cost a heavy spending for the repair…But in the end, everything cleaned up and we have been back to work for the last five days. Phewwwww!!!!…
I have to admit that without Ruggero’s strength and his steady loving support by my side, I would be lost and dead by now with all that depressing happenings during the last week.
Although the van’s already back on its wheels and running, L’olivo has been back to its operation and had a very good weekend sale, personally, my head and my heart are not on the same page anymore. Now that both our children have left home and I am still fighting fiercely with the emptiness and struggling to make sense of our lives’ purposes and meanings, more than ever, I am clinging tightly to the connections with my family and to Ruggero for the survivals of our existences.
I have been on the phone a lot lately with my sisters, my children (especially my daughter Vicki) to make me feel connected and it does help to fill the big emptiness in my heart. I even go on Facebook and Gmail to send several messages to friends and family in Italy to keep in touch with them. And then at the end of the day, there is one person who is there with me physically and emotionally every step of the way, the one who has been the tower of strength and love and support is Ruggero.
I know that no matter what happen in the future or the days ahead, the power of love from him, from my children, our families here and in Italy, plus a few of our truly good friends here and abroad, will give me the strength to carry on with life. I will be OK. And I am so thankful to all of them. I love them dearly.